Thursday, 25 April 2013

Calling a Truce


"... I want everyone to shut up about what I should worry about right now and how much I should want my old body back and how soon I should try to get it. How I should be preparing now to get it back, even before my daughter is done growing inside it. Stretch marks are not life-changing. She is life-changing. She is becoming a part of my story and the story of my body." -Kate Fridkis

I recently read this article on the pressures of getting your body back after baby. And it really hit home for me. If you are pregnant, or a mother, I urge you to read it. We have been brainwashed to worry about our bodies changing, and about losing the pregnancy weight even before we give birth.

In my third trimester, when I was gaining weight the quickest, I often felt like I had to get some plan of action. How would I prepare? Sometimes I would consider cooking all my meals in advance and freezing them. Maybe I should hire some afternoon help so I could get to the gym, I would often think.

I mean some of us are actually more worried about losing the baby weight than we are about the baby. And can you blame us? Our lives a saturated with it. Everywhere you go, someone is marketing to the new mom. Eat this to feel full. Do this program to tighten your tummy. Rub this on to fade those stretch marks. I actually had someone leave me a comment on Facebook, "oh good, honey, you didn't gain that much weight, it should be easier to lose it after that baby."

Really? Thanks.

And don't get me started on the tabloids. The awful tabloids who applaud the women who are back in a bikini 6 weeks after giving birth. The ones who criticize women who gain too much while pregnant. And advise us on how to dress so we flatter our growing bump. It's on the cover of every magazine.


This will probably be the only time you hear me say this, but I actually feel terrible for Kim K. Thank goodness the paparazzi wasn't around to watch me eat hogs at 10:00am. I mean, I even broke the cardinal rule of wearing stretchy pants out after 32 weeks.

Here I am at less than 4 months post partum, and I find myself being critical of my body and weight. And It's so ridiculous.

You know what I would say to my best friend? I would remind her how incredible her body is. That it created and carried life for 9 months. It labored and birthed a life. And it provides for and sustains that life every hour of every day. And that is something to be proud of.

I don't want my daughter to grow up in a world where she doesn't feel pretty enough, thin enough or popular enough. I want to raise her to be a healthy, confident, and happy girl. And it begins by leading by example. It starts with me.

Yesterday during my devotional, I asked God not to help with my struggle to get my pre-baby body back. I prayed that I could be proud of the journey my body has taken me on, that I could be confident in my new mommy skin, and be a healthy example of living and confidence for my daughter.



  1. What a great post. And I am with you on being happy with your body while growing a human being inside you. And then loving it afterwards too. You made a perfect little person don't go judging yourself so harshly because you don't look like you did when you were 19 1 week after having a baby!

  2. Ugh I struggle with wanting my old body back too! Love this post!

  3. This is a great and much needed post. I had it good when I was pregnant -- Gained 15lbs and pretty much just had a ball under my shirt. By no means am I bragging, I just felt lucky. But towards the end I start to swell and I was so nervous because everyone was focusing so much on how well I wore my pregnancy. I didn't want to go out in public because I was embrassed that during my last week my hips and thighs spread so much. Its so stupid. So much unnecessary pressure and stress when the most important thing was/is that I was growing a healthy human. My heart breaks for people like Kim K and Jessica Simpson who have to deal with society judgement pretty much from the day they acknowledge their pregnancy.